Saturday, January 15, 2011

Happy Birthday Mom!

Janice Marie Simmons was born on January 15, 1951 in Iowa to parents Lorne and Charlotte Simmons. She had an older brother, Rick, who cared for her deeply. At the age of 12 she and her family moved to Riverside, CA to make a fresh start since her parents had divorced and remarried each other.  After several years it didn't work out and they divorced a second time. 

 1951 about 6 months old




1953
With her father and brother.
Jan was a spit fire when she was little.  She would stand up to her Dad when he did something that she didn't like.


She once shared with me a funny story...
When she was a little girl she thought black babies were so much luckier than white babies.  Black babies got to drink chocolate breast milk, but all the white babies got was plain white breast milk.


Ted's grad night, 1968. High School Sweethearts.
While in high school, Jan worked at Kentucky Fried Chicken.
She also started smoking at the age of 16. She once told me a story about going out in the unofficial smoking area and taking a smoking break with the teachers at Ramona. Times sure have changed!

1969
Senior Class Picture
It snowed in Riverside during her senior year, and she ditched school that day.  She said if it ever snowed while we were in school we could skip that day too.  It didn't snow again in Riverside for another 40 years...2009. (At least not that I'm aware of.)


1972 Jan with first husband and pregnant with her first daughter Lori.
She was married on Feb 14, 1971. 

Jan and Lori, about 1977


Jan and Lisa early 1980

June 21, 1980
Married the boy next door...literally.
She met my father while she was living with her mother after her first divorce and my Dad moved in next door. She moved in with him, had my sister Lisa, got married, and then had me in 1981. She told me that she purposefully waited to marry my father until after she had Lisa to prove that she married my Dad because she wanted to, not because she had to. They divorced in 1985 and we moved next door into Grandma's house until 1987 when she  reconnected with her high school sweetheart, Ted.  We moved out of Grandma's house and into a rented house with Ted. That same year she became pregnant, but later miscarried.  On May 7, 1988 they were married on a mountain top.  We were all so happy, Ted was a keeper!  That same month we moved into the house she would live in the rest of her life.  In December 1988 she had my brother Jody. During this time, she worked for the Riverside County Welfare department, but because they wouldn't give her more than 6 weeks maternity leave, she decided to quit her job and open a home day care business.  She successfully operated it in her home for the next 20 years, until she was physically unable to care for the children anymore.

Halloween 1989
She loved listening to oldies music.  She would call in to the local radio station (KRTH 101.1) so much that she won several thousand dollars in cash prizes in her life.  She was a devoted fan!


Lori's HS graduation, June 1990
Jan is holding her only boy, Jody. She always said that if she would have had a boy first, she would have stopped having babies.  She loved Jody very much, but I guess he was a lot harder than her three girls. 

early 1990s
Jan is on the left holding Jody, and my beloved Grandma is on the far right.  She passed in 1996.
Also pictured is myself, Godmother Linda, and sisters Lisa & Teresa.  My mom and Grandma had such a close relationship.  They talked every day and were best friends and they always lived in the same zip code...92504.  My mother cared for her mother the last months of her life.  The last full day they shared together was Mother's day 1996.  Grandma passed away the next morning.  My mom was by her side, reading to her and loving her on that very special Mother's day.  


In late 2002, she was diagnosed with COPD. She finally quite smoking after 35 years, cold turkey.  It took its toll on her body and she was forced to wear an oxygen tube for the rest of her life.  We were all so proud of her that she was able to beat the addiction.  We were blessed to have her for another 8 years.


May 2005
Grandma Jan with Erin and Howie


May 2009, this was our last visit with her alive and active. We were planning on going out in March of this year to visit her, but that obviously got bumped up sooner.


May 2009
Out to dinner in Riverside, CA at her favorite restaurant, Ancho's.

As a child and as an adult, everyone told me how much alike I am with my mom.  I look like her and I act like her.  Honestly, I didn't like hearing that.  I fought it. I wanted to be my own person.  As a teenager I found my mom to be quite annoying.  Now that I am older and she is gone, all those "annoying" qualities are now endearing.  We are both stubborn and it makes me sad that we didn't have a closer relationship. We had a good relationship, but it wasn't as close as she had with her mother, and that saddens me.  Now I must move on and work on my relationship with my own daughter.  I will cherish the good times I had with her, appreciate her annoying endearing qualities, and not take people in my life for granted. She was a very good woman, but sometimes it was hard for me to see that.  


Thank you for allowing me to honor my Mother on her 60th birthday. Every year on her children's birthday she would sing the Happy Birthday song.  It didn't matter if we were living in the house or in Japan.  She sang it!  Now, we will sing to her today to celebrate her life.

Happy birthday to you,
Happy birthday to you,
Happy birthday dear Mom,
Happy birthday to you!

I love you!


1 comment:

bigskygirl said...

What a great tribute to your Mom, Tina! I love the pictures, the songs and your beautiful thoughts. God be with you as you are separated from your mother, may He provide comfort and peace.